Wednesday, 17 September 2014

Good Enough

Having been lulled into a false sense of security in the holidays, where all I had to do was drop the children at holiday club and then go to work, it was a bit of a shock to get back into the swing of everything that primary school brings with it. So now there's lunchboxes, after school activities, listening to reading, checking spellings, dressing up days, coming up with an Anglo Saxon village crafted from weetabix and string. Possibly...

It got me thinking about my life, and whether I am 'good enough' in different areas. It's something I've also spent time talking about with other women recently, and there seem to be common themes emerging. For instance, it feels like it's not enough to just hang about at home with a toddler and a baby doing the stay-at-home-parent bit. Oh no, now you have to do that (making sure that you're doing all sorts of worthwhile and enriching activities with them, *not* mainlining Cbeebies into their eyeballs) plus setting up your own business on the side, probably involving upcycling vintage milk churns.

My children are older and at school, and as I *only* work part time my tiny little brain seems to think I should have plenty of time for not just paid work but unpaid stuff sitting on committees, helping out at school, attending *all* school events (after all, I have flexible working, there's no excuse!), cooking delicious and nutritious meals from scratch every day. Preferably using ingredients either foraged from the hedgerows or shopped for daily from chi chi la la independent retailers with whom I have a deep and personal connection.

And then there's the creative side. A quick glance at Pinterest informs me that I'm probably slacking in the homemade gift department please don't mention fucking Christmas.  And I'm not drawing enough, sewing enough or or or or...

Except of course, this is ridiculous.  I'm doing this to myself, and I'm sure there are some of you out there who do it too. So I'm trying to say to myself that I really am good enough.

My children go to school every day - big tick
I go to work and get paid - big tick
We finally have new signage outside our local community centre - big tick
I'm going to WI tonight - big tick
I've just finished a pair of socks - big tick
We will eat tea tonight - big tick

And breathe...

Apologies for the rant, I have a cold and may be a little grumpy.